I was once going through a knowledge sheet where H. H. Sri Sri Ravishankar (Guruji) talks about love and lust. In love he says, even an object gets life. We name our vehicle, we talk to our toys, children draw sun with a smiling face :) . And in lust he says, even human beings become objects. Such a wonderful description of why lust bothers some people? Here I am not staging a dharna against lust. I believe that every aspect of humanity has its place in the creation. And food and sex being the most common impressions among all the species, lust has definitely played one of the most significant role in the way our world is designed today.
But what does lust really give you? Osho once said, "Is it sex that gives you the pleasure? Think about it. I do not want you to give up on sex. As a matter of fact, I would say meditate on sex." While I am yet to come to a level where I can understand how to meditate on sex, I certainly loved to contemplate on what he said next. "Think about it, is it really sex that gives you the joy or is it the moment of completion of a desire that gives you the joy?" And I tried to relate it with every desire that I had so far. Is it my degree that gave me the joy or the moment of completion of the desire to graduate? Is it Rasagulla that gives me the joy or the moment of fulfilling a craving that gives me the joy? So while attempting to understand what he said, maybe this kind of material joy is simply filling up of a crevice or a craving.
So is it possible to live that crevice-free life? Is it wrong to have lustful feelings? I think it is perfectly normal to have these feelings. In fact if you are lust free then quite possible that there is some hormonal imbalance and you need some medical check up. But in such a situation how to keep a check on that craving? Is that craving really bad? Is it wrong if I crave for sex?
I am no guru to answer such questions. And most certainly sex is the only contributing factor for the survival of life on this planet (and I can fairly assume elsewhere too). Sex was never a trouble for mankind. It is sex that ferments into lust which eventually takes form of violence that create issues where people quit their day's work and come on streets hampering law and order. It is this form of violence that has the power to destroy generations of the victim's family. Well of course I agree that not everyone is curious to rape women. But then lust in milder forms encourages forced flesh trade where millions of girls everyday are crushing their hopes, aspirations, dreams and most importantly their self respect to satiate a man's uncontrolled desire.
Again agreed, it is certainly not that easy to curb your desires. And I am not even going to encourage that here. But I would certainly like to share certain insights that I have got in my spiritual journey so far. There are certainly spiritual ways in which we can keep a check on that energy. The life force energy entering into various chakras of our body vibrates our body into different emotions and feelings. One of these feelings being lust. Breathing techniques and meditation certainly help to channelize this life force energy in and out of various chakras. And from what I understand, a person meditating for many years gets a say over the flow of this energy. Imagine where you get to decide, what emotion should you be in rather than the situation dictating your emotions. Among various simple techniques that Guruji has suggested, one is taking cold water bath. Try it out, certainly helps.
What helps further is understanding lust from a broader perspective. Certainly lust is an unfulfilled desire. Once Guruji said, every desire eventually ferments into a botheration. And similarly, an unfulfilled desire of sex dwells into lust. Where does this desire come from? From a feeling of lack, from a space of 'I don't have something'. This feeling of lack gets one into grumbling mode. Isn't it? Do we like grumbling people around us? Do you think anyone would enjoy your company if you are in a grumbling mode? Hence certainly if someone is full of lust, s/he automatically exudes repelling vibrations. And then we have youth grumbling upon, "I don't have girl friend." "I am 20 and still a virgin." Why would someone like to get close to a person with such vibes? So what is an antidote to this unfulfilled desire?
Take your mind to the time when you had complete gratitude. Maybe for your parents, your teachers, your friends who helped you in a dire situation. If you cannot find such moments, think harder. Still if there is no trace of a single moment, then we certainly have a problem that needs quick attention. When we are in the moment of gratitude, we are full. We are complete. We notice no lack. There are no desires and hence no crevices to be cemented. It is this feeling of gratitude or contentment that empowers us to get over any negative feeling. It is indeed our way to tackle the Dermentors (Yeah! Harry Potter geek). So how to be in this energy of fulfillment, contentment and gratitude? Just keep counting your blessings. Be happy about the people in your life, the events that brought smile to you, the situations that made you brave. I would certainly encourage you to experiment on this and discover if there is any relation between this act and your unfulfilled desires.
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